Tuesday, April 1, 2008

I fail at food

Yesterday, I wanted a Choco Taco. So, I put my $1.50 into the vending machine. The mechanism turned... not enough, my tasty treat was still on the shelf, and no amount of shoving the machine would budge it. Because I'm a fool, I decided that a waffle cone shell filled with ice cream, chocolate, and peanuts was worth $3.00 to me, and so put in another $1.50. Now I had TWO huge helpings of fat and sugar fall to the tray below. Nobody was around to give one to, so I ate both of those deliciously decadent delicacies.

I'd seen the ΑΦΩ blood drive in the Union, but I decided I was too lazy to bother donating. When I settled down in a lounge with my confections and my laptop, I got an email from the Indiana Blood Center urging me to donate. "All right, all right, I'm going," and so I did. But my lazy side rebelled all the way. It was nice to share the fun of blood full of sugar and caffeine. Hope some heart patient or diabetic doesn't get mine.

I hate those bright neon-colored bandages they have afterwards; the only colors are bright baby blue, purple, pink, and lime green. They just scream "Look at me, I gave blood. Aren't I special?" ... as I reflect on the hypocrisy of announcing to the Internet at large, where nobody cares, that I gave blood and want to tell people about it. Anyways, I would've been perfectly happy with an ordinary Ace bandage, but nooooooo, the sorority girls would complain that it's "not fashionable."

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